Has your current or a past partner ever accused you of being needy or dependent? While your intentions may be entirely good, being too clingy in a relationship is anything but that. You may enjoy spending time with your partner, but it’s imperative to have some boundaries in place. These five essential steps can help you go from clingy to self-sufficient with just a bit of self-awareness.

Put Down the Phone

If you tend to be the clingy type, you may be used to constantly contacting your partner throughout the day. Whether via text, talking on the phone, or sending pictures, articles, and emails, your days may currently consist of endless back and forth. However, while you may simply miss your partner and enjoy being always in close contact with them, this can come off as clingy and needy. Rather than giving your partner space to be able to concentrate on other matters, take on the day, and have some downtime, you may be bombarding, distracting, or annoying them.

If you find yourself doing this to distract yourself or procrastinate from doing tasks you don’t particularly favor, consider switching it up and texting a friend instead or finding a different outlet for your focus like going for a walk or meditating.

Pursue Your Own Passions

Being clingy in a relationship can often stem from a person’s lack of other interests and hobbies. Strive to have your own life away from your partner and make your personal passions and pursuits a priority. Having activities and pastimes that are important to you can help you to find your own path that’s separate from your partner and create a more whole and fulfilling life for yourself.

You don’t need to spend every moment with your partner, so be sure to find your own areas of interest, as this will make you more independent, interesting, and engaging. It will open you up to making friendships with people who enjoy the same things and build a community for yourself that doesn’t rely on one singular connection—a support system you could rely on if things get rocky in your romantic relationship. Plus, you won’t find yourself feeling so lost when your partner is absent or doing their own things.

Give Your Partner Space

You may not like your partner doing things without you. Whether it’s having dinner with friends, going out to a bar, or seeing a movie, clingy people in relationships have a hard time with the fact that their partner has a life away from them. However, it’s vitally important to the health and success of your relationship that your partner is able to do and enjoy things without you, as it’s the unique facets of your personality that make you a better team. Since you’re a couple and not a clone of your partner, you should support your endeavors and desire to go golfing with friends or have a girls’ night. This way you’re showing your partner that you care about their needs, that you’re secure in the relationship, and that you place a priority on their happiness—even if it doesn’t always include you.

Team Versuasion Pakistan – Fareeha Robert