One of the simplest things you can do for your relationship is to be proactive in managing the time you spend on yourself, being a couple, and being a family. Many times, life gets busy and a committed partner slips into becoming a roommate who is also exhausted.  Work, kids, social obligations; all these things will take every bit of time you have and more if you do not manage them. Folks who make love last learn how to set boundaries in their different roles and give time to what is important to them.Think about it like this, if you are a parent then you must make time for: yourself as an individual, yourself as part of a couple, yourself as your role in your larger family.  Dedicate too much time to one of those identities and the others become neglected, also problems can pop up in the role where you are over functioning.So, let’s look at how a little bit of time management in each role can lead to lasting love.

Individual Self/Couples

Often people think that the solution to every problem in a relationship is to spend more time together, more closeness.  That can do harm to a loving relationship.  Can you truly desire what you never miss?  Spend too much time together and contempt can block out any appreciation for your partner.  I think of it as self-induced cabin fever.Making some time for your individual self allows you to practice self care as well as miss the people in your life that you love.  A moment to pursue your own passions while having a little vacation away from your responsibilities as partner and/or parent does a world of good.  You re-join your relationship roles with energy and possibly new insights into your appreciation for your loved ones.A little bit of space in a relationship allows longing to reignite passion’s flame.  All sorts of wonderful things can happen if you take a little time to nurture your individual self.  Just be sure that you don’t fall into the trap of spending too much time in this role.  Resentments can easily develop when one partner feels they are too alone within a relationship, so after some individual time make sure to set up time to devote to your other roles.

Many folks look back at the beginning of their relationship with fondness.  They remember all the dates, trips, and happy times discovering each other.  Then work, PTA meetings, the lawn; all these things seem to conspire to take over your life.  Your relationship is left longing.There are three main ways to make time for your partnership.  You must make time to talk, time to date, and time to connect physically.  Time to talk includes conversations about what is working well and challenges within your relationship.  If you’re parents, use this time to discuss your dynamics as a couple.  Focus on your role within the larger family will be discussed at a different time.  Making time to communicate about your relationship will help you avoid conflicts in the future and help you feel like a teammate with your partner.  Working together against the chaos of the world.  Taking time to have a date night is important too.Life cannot be all work, so a night to focus on connecting and enjoyment helps strengthen a relationship.  This could be anything from a fancy dinner out to a walk around town lake.  Just taking a little time to re-establish your romantic connection will strengthen your relationship.  It makes a deposit into your relationship’s emotional bank account, so that when you need to make a withdrawal in the future your relationship can withstand it.