Are there really “tips” to overcome sadness, disappointment, anger and all those feelings and emotions that invade us when a love relationship ends? I don’t think there are magic recipes that make us feel good, what I do think can help is to allow the dismay and pain to manifest, do their work and then invite them to withdraw.

Yes, that whirlwind of negative emotions that shakes us after a breakup are important and have a function that we will review below. We can also turn to other situations, experiences or people to mitigate the sadness.

1. Allow yourself to have feelings

Do not put all your effort in chasing away the grief, pain and anguish, because they are part of the process, of the mourning that you must elaborate of that relationship that ended. Allowing yourself to feel (the good and the bad) is the first step in building your emotional strength.

Try to identify your emotions, feel them, live them. Listen to your body: what does it feel: tiredness, stomach aches, headaches, heart aches? Understanding the physical and emotional binomial will help you to at least put a name to what you feel and to know what happens to your body when it experiences it.

2. Log off

Don’t be tempted to go through social networks looking for photos or stories of the person who has already left because it could be very painful. We all have different times, and perhaps your ex-partner has other resources that may differ from yours to deal with grief.

 Obsessing over the past will only prolong the pain and make it even bigger. Reset your list of people followed and followers, believe me it is the healthiest thing you can do to move through this pain cleanly.

3. Look for people who love you well

Friends, family, or even that plant or pet that always listens to you (even if it doesn’t respond). Surrounding yourself with a circle of support is crucial. Talking about your feelings eases the emotional burden and reminds you that you are not alone in this. Also, writing down what is happening to you is liberating because you somehow manage to get it all out.

However, don’t confuse friendships with partners. Be very careful about embarking on a new relationship in the hope that your new companionship will help you forget the one who has left. We know that loneliness can create a fertile environment for making hasty decisions in search of comfort. Discover the fullness within yourself before seeking it in another heart.

These are just a few tips or tools you can count on to overcome a breakup. Surely you have many more resources to move forward.

I invite you to share this message with anyone you think may need some words of encouragement in love. Please, visit Versuasions in English to read, share, and live more content like this.

Translator Jimena Freytes